YOU’LL NEVER REACH YOUR GOAL WITHOUT THIS

We don’t really chase things—we chase feelings. This post explores why our true goals aren’t houses, cars, or salaries, but the emotions we believe they’ll give us. Learn how to set goals that actually fulfill you, not just impress others. Let me know if you want variations for LinkedIn, Instagram, or email subject lines too.

6/20/20252 min read

Goals Are Not About Things — They’re About Feelings

When we set goals, we often imagine specific things:

A house in Miami. A new car. A higher salary.

But here's the truth:

You're not chasing the house. You're chasing how you'll feel when you have it.

The real goal is that feeling.

Proud. Safe. Free. Successful. Loved. Respected.

We think goals are about “things,” but really, goals are about emotions.

The Brain Doesn’t Think in Details — It Thinks in Feelings

Your brain doesn't get excited by exact numbers or plans.

It gets excited by how something feels.

That’s why people often lose motivation halfway through a goal.

They focused on what they want, not why they want it.

Yes, specific goals give us direction.

But emotions give us energy.

The Future Is Unpredictable

No matter how carefully you plan, your life won’t go exactly the way you imagine.

There are too many variables. Too many unknowns.

So instead of trying to control every detail of your future, ask yourself a better question:

“How do I want to feel in the future?”

That answer is your compass. That feeling can come in many forms, and in many different situations. You don’t need to obsess over what it will look like — just stay true to how you want to feel.

Work With What You Have Now

Right now, you’re in a specific situation.

You have certain resources, responsibilities, and opportunities.

Use them.

Maybe it means taking on more responsibility.

Maybe it means asking for a raise.

Maybe it means starting something on the side.

Whatever it is — use what you have now to move in the direction of that desired feeling.

As you grow, new, bigger opportunities will open up. Step by step.

Don’t Try to Draw the Full Picture

Trying to paint your future life in perfect detail can backfire.

Why? Because life rarely goes to plan. And that mismatch can lead to disappointment.

Instead, choose a direction — a vector — based on how you want to feel.

Keep moving that way.

And at every step, ask:

“What can I do today that moves me closer to that feeling?”

Then go do it.

Try this

Often, we discover that our “goals” are really emotional needs we haven’t fully named yet.

This simple exercise helps you get clear on your real goals — the emotional ones.

Write down things you want in the future.
Example: A new car, a bigger home, monthly vacations with family, double the income.
Now ask: What feeling is behind each of these?
- Feeling respected at work?
- Feeling safe and financially secure?
- Feeling loved and surrounded by family?
Look deeper. Is that feeling more complex than you first thought?